Hodge Podge

I really have no set theme for today's post. But there are a few things that I would like to just jabber on about.

First of all, Imbolc is coming up. I haven't even begun to plan out my ritual for it this year. I'm so used to doing things alone. It's different having another person join in with me. More than likely it will be something simple, just like my Yule ritual was very simple. I almost just want to celebrate today because it's almost 60 degrees (for Michigan, at the end of January, this is just unheard of!). I really have to sit down today or tomorrow and plan/write this thing out.

Secondly, I'm going to vent about this pregnancy for just a moment. I am finding it really hard this time around to talk to my baby. With my first son, I sang to/read to/babbled on and on to from the moment we decided we were going to keep him. This child however... I just can't. I think about him all the time. He is constantly on my mind. I am excited to have him join our family. But the most I ever say to him out loud is "Please let mommy eat!". My hands are always on my tummy. Maybe the baby is more a hands on child and I just instinctively know that... I don't know.

Ok... moving on. My son is getting so big. I notice it all the time. But this morning it made me want to cry. I'm so proud of who he is becoming. But in so many ways, I want my little boy back. He is at the point where he gets himself up and ready for school. He doesn't need me to do anything but get him dinner. And he's been helping me cook so soon I won't even be needed for that. And yes, I know that I am going to be having a very dependent little baby. But it's not the same. My son has always been independent and I am so glad that he is. It's just so bittersweet to see him grow up.

He is going to be such an awesome big brother too. He talks to my belly all the time. Comes up and rubs my baby bump to see if he can feel the baby kicking. Ever since he found out I was pregnant he goes online once a week and researches the baby's development. He even asked if he could be there when the baby was delivered. I am personally not against it. But I don't think that he needs to see me in that much pain.

Lastly....ok I realize I list out my paragraphs often. I can't help it. I am a 'lister'. I make lists for my lists. It tends to get out of hand. But I LOVE to organize things. I love cleaning. I love putting things in their place (that includes people too!! LOL...I wish I was kidding).

Anyway, I would like to say thank you...to everyone who takes time out of their day to read whatever random thoughts I put down in words. I know who a few of you are... but for the most part, the rest of you are a mystery. But I want each and everyone of you to know how much I appreciate your time and audience. I never once imagined that I would have as many readers as I do.