Hodge Podge

I really have no set theme for today's post. But there are a few things that I would like to just jabber on about.

First of all, Imbolc is coming up. I haven't even begun to plan out my ritual for it this year. I'm so used to doing things alone. It's different having another person join in with me. More than likely it will be something simple, just like my Yule ritual was very simple. I almost just want to celebrate today because it's almost 60 degrees (for Michigan, at the end of January, this is just unheard of!). I really have to sit down today or tomorrow and plan/write this thing out.

Secondly, I'm going to vent about this pregnancy for just a moment. I am finding it really hard this time around to talk to my baby. With my first son, I sang to/read to/babbled on and on to from the moment we decided we were going to keep him. This child however... I just can't. I think about him all the time. He is constantly on my mind. I am excited to have him join our family. But the most I ever say to him out loud is "Please let mommy eat!". My hands are always on my tummy. Maybe the baby is more a hands on child and I just instinctively know that... I don't know.

Ok... moving on. My son is getting so big. I notice it all the time. But this morning it made me want to cry. I'm so proud of who he is becoming. But in so many ways, I want my little boy back. He is at the point where he gets himself up and ready for school. He doesn't need me to do anything but get him dinner. And he's been helping me cook so soon I won't even be needed for that. And yes, I know that I am going to be having a very dependent little baby. But it's not the same. My son has always been independent and I am so glad that he is. It's just so bittersweet to see him grow up.

He is going to be such an awesome big brother too. He talks to my belly all the time. Comes up and rubs my baby bump to see if he can feel the baby kicking. Ever since he found out I was pregnant he goes online once a week and researches the baby's development. He even asked if he could be there when the baby was delivered. I am personally not against it. But I don't think that he needs to see me in that much pain.

Lastly....ok I realize I list out my paragraphs often. I can't help it. I am a 'lister'. I make lists for my lists. It tends to get out of hand. But I LOVE to organize things. I love cleaning. I love putting things in their place (that includes people too!! LOL...I wish I was kidding).

Anyway, I would like to say thank you...to everyone who takes time out of their day to read whatever random thoughts I put down in words. I know who a few of you are... but for the most part, the rest of you are a mystery. But I want each and everyone of you to know how much I appreciate your time and audience. I never once imagined that I would have as many readers as I do.

Great news!!

We had, yet another, doctor's appointment today! Just to check to make sure everything is on schedule and that the baby is developing as it should. Everything is just peachy keen! Although, next month, I have to go in for a standard glucose test (bleh...awful). But the great news is that:

YES!! WE ARE HAVING A BOY!!!!

I have told EVERYONE from the beginning that we were having a boy. Everyone kept telling me, oh you don't know for sure, there is no way to tell this early, and a lot of other blah blah blah. But, just like with my son, I just knew. I listened to my body and intuition. I believe all mothers have that ability. Most tend to confuse what they want with what their body is telling them. Even more do not know how to listen to their body's or intuition.

Unfortunately, this post is going to be rather short today. For me, it's bad enough to be pregnant. Now, I have caught a head cold on top of it! So, for a few days I am going to be resting up and getting as much vitamin C as the doctor would allow. I am going to be continuing my research for the blog/garden/baby and will post as much as I possibly can.

Blessed Be My Friends
)O(

Who's in your community?

I have recently found myself in the welcoming arms of the pagan community. For a long time I was a solitary witch. I spent a lot of energy hiding my craft, practices, and beliefs from everyone around me. It wasn't until a few months ago that I even had the courage to step out and say 'This is me!'.

The turn around in my openness came from being able to surround myself with people who think and live similarly to me. I belong to a few online pagan communities, have supportive friends online, and have found friends that live near me who also practice.

Now as I stated before, I was a solitary witch for quite sometime. There are many aspects of being solitary that I thoroughly enjoyed. I loved the ability to be free to practice when- and how- ever I so chose to. Not having to work on someone else's schedule or time frame was amazing. I have always enjoyed research and studying (my teacher's may say otherwise though). I rarely came across a topic that I didn't find absolutely fascinating. I did miss not having someone to share my knowledge with. I also wished that I was able to ask others for opinions and have them share their knowledge with me.

I have been invited into two different circles (I wouldn't call either a coven exactly) as of late. One, unfortunately, was not the right fit for me. The women who invited me still make an effort to keep me included in their community, I just do not practice with them. The other... it just felt right from the very beginning. We span a few states so practicing is still somewhat solitary, but it's nice to know that their are others out there who are working towards the same end product as me. We share our knowledge freely and openly, which coming from my background, is awesome!

Being a part of a community, or a few in my case, has helped me to express my faith and beliefs in a way I never thought possible. Not only have my online/offline communities helped me to connect to other pagans but they have showed me that I am not alone! I have kind of become a freedom of religion activist. I do not only support my own faith, but that of those who surround me. I have found that pagans, on a whole, are far more accepting of others than others are of us. And when I start to feel picked on and alone, I simply turn to those around me who have dealt with the same thing.

A very valuable source I have found, believe it or not, is Facebook! I have connected with pagans across the nation/world. Some have become very close friends of mine, offering me inspiration and encouragement whenever I need it. As well as advice and support when I am in desperate need. Most of my loyal readers are Facebookers as well!

Being a part of a community, whether it be online or in your own backyard, can be very beneficial to your practice and faith. I do suggest that you find a community that suits you and feels right. Never feel pressured or uncomfortable when joining one. If you do, I suggest you RUN in the other direction. Trust your instincts and surround yourself with people you WANT to be surrounded by.

Time to listen...

Merry Meet Everyone!!

I am in a great mood today. I was finally able to get out of bed. I cooked dinner for the first time in 4 months! And we had a great sitdown family dinner!! It always makes me happy to see my family gathered around the table enjoying time together. Also, my son helped me prepare the dinner today. Completely unlike him but the help was greatly appreciated. Not to mention, it was fun to have him in the kitchen with me. Even if it did make the process take twice as long.

Now, time to dive straight in!

Many times we hear things, but we don't actually listen. This happens in almost every aspect of our lives. I know there are many times when my boyfriend will say something. I hear his voice... but the words just don't register with me. My son babbles on for hours about this or that. I hear him. But, I admit, I rarely actually listen to the ins and outs of how a clone trooper came to be.

This doesn't just apply to my small family either. Many times when I was outside I could hear the birds and crickets that dwell in the shadows of my breezeway. Until recently, I rarely took the time to listen to what was going on around me. Now when I step outside, there is a symphony of sounds and life buzzing around me. I swear, on my more in-tuned days, I can hear the grass growing!

Very few people actually take the time to step outside themselves and just enjoy the life cycles that are thriving around them on a daily basis. Now, even I don't do it everyday. Life happens and I get too busy with homework, household chores, or my crafting. But I try. Even if it's only for a few moments. I find that once I take the time to listen, my life not only takes on a different meaning but I feel more connected to the earth and all the living things around me. And in turn, the Goddess herself.

Listening is a skill that can be transferred to other aspects as well. I used to be a massage therapist before I acquired some health problems that prevented me from doing my job. I have always been really in-tuned with the human body. Even before my training I could always find the knots and pain spots in someone's back or shoulders without really trying. After training I was not only able to listen to my clients body's with amazing ease, but I learned a lot about listening to my own body. In turn, and even I found this slightly weird, I was able to better understand my vehicle. I could tell when things were going wrong with my car by the way the gas peddle reacted under my foot.

Also, listening to your own intuition...something a lot of people have gotten away from. I use my intuition on a daily basis. Rather than always following what my head is telling me is right, I follow what I FEEL is the right path. Of course, discretion is advised! You can't go all willy nilly with it. And it is almost like a muscle, the more you use it, the stronger it becomes! Don't mistake intuition for emotions though. That can simply get you into trouble. And there are times when even your head has to step in and say 'Wait a gosh darn minute, and just think about this first!' But on the whole, your intuition will hardly ever lead you down the path.

There is a great site that goes into to this a little deeper and offers help on using your intuition.
http://www.angelfire.com/hi/TheSeer/intuition.html I suggest that anyone who wants to delve deeper into this subject start here.

Well... that is all for today!

Blessed Be My Friends!
        )O(

I'm sooo sorry...

I know it has been a very long time since I have posted last. I am still doing research for my other page on Sabbats and trying to figure out if I want to break it into sections or just flood y'all with information. I am leaning towards breaking it into sections and giving information based on the upcoming Sabbat.

What has taken me so incredibly long to get to get to all of this is that...well.. I'm pregnant. The lack of energy and sleep, coupled with vicious morning sickness (yea, it's supposed to go away after the first trimester, I'm not one of those lucky ones.), household chores, and still taking care of our boy takes it toll on me and my body. Unfortunately, blogging just doesn't take priority over those other things.

That does not mean I've forgotten all of my loyal readers though. I still try to come up with topics for future posts and information that I think you will find interesting. I hate boring people. That...that doesn't read quite the way it should. Oh, to have voice inflection over the Internet.

Today's topic is going to be (drum roll please) ...... music.

When you come into my house and I'm the one in charge of the music (I do not take any credit whatsoever for my boyfriends taste in music... in my opinion most of it makes my eardrums bleed) you will hear anything from opera to Ted Nugent (Yes, I am listening to him right this moment. Fred Bear is one of my all time favorite songs!) to some of my favorite pagan artists. One of my new favorites is Lindie Lila! Check her out if you've never heard her before http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L5Y73oMcS7w&feature=results_main&playnext=1&list=PL88517E2B39ED2676. She is a new favorite of mine, a very close friend recommended her. I was NOT disappointed at all!! I have to admit, I usually listen to her when blogging. She helps me focus.

I strongly believe that music is intertwined into our souls. Most songs, at least for me, always provoke some kind of emotion. Whether it be a blanket emotion like happiness or excitement; or something stronger that provokes an intense feeling associated with a memory. Music has the power to make us laugh, cry, or dance in the woods naked! It is an essential part of all my rituals.

It's no wonder that almost if not all religions use music in their worship. What better way to honor and feel close to the Gods then through song. I have known a few people who did not listen to music, my best friend being one of them. Those few turned out to be either atheist or later on agnostic. I wonder if there is a correlation there. Maybe someone should do a study.

I know this post is much shorter than my usuals, but I do have housework that needs to be done. And I prefer to get it finished before the little man gets home from school.


~Blessed Be My Friends~
         )O(

Under Construction...

I am starting to work on a new project for the blog. I am going to be adding a few pages, starting with the Wheel of the Year and the Sabbats. The other pages are still up for debate at this current time. Because of the research that I put into my posts I don't know if I will be able to keep up on daily posts. So it may be a few days before I am able to put up regular posts again.

I apologize to my very loyal readers for any possible delays in getting you your daily dose of witchery.

Halos, Coronas, and Folklore

Last night I witnessed, thanks to a friend on Facebook, the most amazing Moon Halo I've ever seen! It was absolutely HUGE! Unfortunately, I was unable to do a full moon ritual last night. Time constraints made it impossible for me. Not to mention that the baby decided that I needed another bout of nausea to deal with. Instead, I spoke with the Goddess and spent time worshipping her beauty.

I was surprised that this morning I had a post on my status suggesting that I do a blog post on the moon (from the same friend that gave me the heads up about the full moon). So, this post is dedicated to that person and anyone else who is completely enthralled with the beauty of the moon.

The phenomenon that was witnessed by many, here in Michigan, is called a Moon Halo. It's caused by the moon's light refracting through hexagonal shaped crystals in the upper atmosphere. The shape of the crystals result in the large ring around the moon. I wish that this next picture showed the true beauty of what we saw. Alas, it does not do it justice.

Now, there is a certain folklore that goes along with these halos. And it is all based on the weather patterns that are to come following the full moon.

A ring around the moon = bad weather to come in the near future.
      (Interesting side note: It is believed that the number of stars within the halo determines how many days until the bad weather arrives.)

Dark mist over the moon inside the halo = rain is coming

Red Halo = high winds are on their way
     
Multiple Rings (which will be explained later) = severe wind blasts,

A single ring that vanishes quickly = fair weather is on the way

Most of the "ring around the moon"s that are seen are not halos, but coronas. They are much smaller in size compared to the halo. Also, coronas can come in several colors. Usually rainbow-like in appearance. They are caused by a different shape of crystal as well as the light hitting the crystal at a different angle. (I forgot the exact degree of the angles. If anyone would like that information, please contact me and I can get it to you.)

(Now this corona is unusually vibrant, but it is a good example)

On occasion halos and coronas encircle the moon at the same time. This causes the multiple rings that I mentioned earlier. Unfortunately, I do not have any pictures of this occurrence.

Many things are associated with the moon, aside from witchcraft and the Goddess. It has been proven that the tides are influenced by the lunar cycles. What is less well known is that investment companies also rely on the moon! A specific example is the people who invest in Brazilian coffee. The moon and frosts are so well connected (and it's a very established connection) that the moon is used to determine the value of the crops coming from Brazil in the winter.

You may have heard the phrase "The crazies are out! It must be a full moon!". Studies have shown that the full moon has an affect on the amount of people admitted into psychiatric wards. Also, arson and murders (most of which are motiveless) are increased on a night with a full moon.

And, if you are a woman, after the birth of your first child you are more likely to give birth to the rest of your children on a full moon. (Is the Goddess busy watching over her children? I'd like to think so!) Most women's menstrual cycles are also directly linked to the cycle of the full moon.

Since this is a pagan blog I do need to put some information out there for my sisters and brothers as well.

The first thing I would like to get out there, and yes most pagans will know this, is the difference between waning and waxing. I used to get tripped up on this ALL the time. That is why I want to define each.

Waning = progressively smaller portion of the visible surface is illuminated (meaning it's getting smaller!)
Waxing = progressively larger portion of the visible surface is illuminated (means it's getting bigger)

Real simple, but it took me YEARS to remember the difference.

The Triple Moon:

A symbol that is, not only stunningly beautiful in appearance but, the representation of the Goddess herself in all forms. The Maiden, The Matron/Mother, and The Crone.


Other things that are associated with the moon:

• Emotions
• Water
• The color white
• The color blue

Because I choose to practice the art of witchcraft the lunar cycles are very important to me, not only for worshipping purposes, but also spell weaving. Since the moon is full I will start there.

The Full Moon is the best time to cast spells for:

• prophecy
• protection
• divination
• love
• knowledge
• money (at one time the moon was thought to be made up of silver, a common currency at the time)
• dreams

Anytime you want to add potency or power to a spell it should be done under a full moon.
This is also when I do my purification rituals. It is, by far, my favorite time to cast.

The Waxing Moon is the best time to cast spells for constructive magick such as:

• love
• wealth
• success
• courage
• friendship
• luck
• health

The Waning Moon is the best time for:

• banishment magick
• ridding addictions
• ridding illness
• getting rid of negativity

The New Moon is for:

• new beginnings
• new ventures
• new love
• romance
• health
• job hunting

Dark Moon Magick can also be performed on the New Moon. I, however, am not very knowledgeable about it, so I prefer not to write about it.

If anyone has any questions at all, I am more than happy to answer them the best I can. Feel free to contact me, either through here, Facebook, or my email address MommaZen@live.com.

I am sorry there was no post yesterday. It was a rough day and I had SO much I had to do with my family. I hope that today's post more than made up for it :)

~Blessed Be~

Incorporation

I was asked a profound question today by a member of the circle I belong to, "How do I incorporate the path into my daily life?". Now that question should be easily answered but it made me sit back, think, and eventually I not only incorporate the Goddess into my daily life, but she is present in almost everything I do.

The easiest way to see her presence in my life is when my son and I have serious discussions about religion. Now, I am not prejudice in discussing religion. I cover all the Gods and Goddesses I have studied over the years. And believe me, there have been enough to fill an encyclopedia. Though I know I am in no way an expert. I believe that the God and Goddess encourage knowledge.

Another way is in prayer. This, however, is what sparked a deeper sense of meaning to me. As I grew up, as I have stated before I had a Christian upbringing, I prayed to God every night when I went to bed like  a good little girl. And that was the extent of my relationship with that God. A bedtime prayer and sometimes a grace before our dinner. With my Goddess, I speak with her at anytime I feel so inclined. Which just happens to be all the time. I never feel obligated or pressured. And it's never really a prayer either. I feel as though she is there listening, guiding, and enjoying our connection. Something I have never experienced before. I offer her my prayers when I am casting or doing rituals. But on a daily basis it's more like I am speaking to a sister or mother. I have a deeper connection with the Goddess than I ever thought possible. I feel her with me when I do dishes, garden, or clean my home. That connection is what reminds me that everything is sacred and deserves to be celebrated, life, death, and the mundane.

I live a much happier existence since I have come out as one of her children. It's like a part of me was still sleeping. When I acknowledged her and our connection, I woke up. It has been one of the most rewarding experiences of my life time. I have always enjoyed casting and doing rituals, but now... being able to practice in the cool night air, under the moon/new moon it is beyond anything I can put into words. Even more, having my son by my side for some of my rituals and being able to discuss my beliefs openly have had a very profound impact on my practice and beliefs. Everything about 'me' seems to have been strengthened.

Also, something that may seem trivial to some, I wear my pentagram/pentacle with pride. Even around my outside family. Before, I kept it with me in my purse or jean pocket so as not to offend anyone. I am done hiding who I am. So, I proudly display that, yes, I am a dirt worshipping pagan and dammit I am proud!

Well, this witch has company today, so I must cut this post short. I am sure I will post more on this topic another day.

~Blessed Be~

What does being a Pagan mean to me?

"When one defines oneself as Pagan, it means she or he follows an earth or nature religion, one that sees the divine manifest in all creation. The cycles of nature are our holy days, the earth is our temple, its plants and creatures our partners and teachers. We worship a deity that is both male and female, a mother Goddess and father God, who together created all that is, was, or will be. We respect life, cherish the free will of sentient beings, and accept the sacredness of all creation." ~Edain McCoy~

Being a Pagan means that I have a deeper connection to the world around me. I feel the magic in the wind and the changing of the leaves. I celebrate everything that the God and Goddess have given to me. I am tolerant of all religions, not seeing any as superior to another. I know that I am connected to everything that surrounds me and that everything is interconnected. I believe that nothing is wasted and that when we die our body returns to the earth and our spirits return to the universe to be used as the Goddess sees fit.

I do NOT worship a devil or any of his kind. I am responsible for my own actions and the way I live my life. I am also responsible for any spell that I cast and the repercussions of those spells. I abide by the threefold law, which states that any energy that I put into the universe, be it positive or negative, will be returned to me threefold.

Being Pagan also means that my choices in religion can and has driven people who I cared about away from me. Conversely, I have also received support from many people that I thought for sure would turn their backs on me. There are some ultra religious people who have surprised me by their support. To me, they are the Christians who truly understand and live their religion. I have a great respect for those people.

I have met many amazing women who share similar beliefs with me. I love having a community of people who understand the problems I go through, who have the same battles I do raising my son, and, yes, who also practices magic.

With all the good and bad things that have transpired since I came out as Pagan (and yes it really was a coming out) I still have to say, I love being me and I love the life that my family and I have created together!

~Blessed Be~

Acceptance!

I hope you all are having a blessed day!

Today's topic is acceptance.

We're going to discuss (or I'm going to ramble on about...) different types of acceptance that I had to face when I chose this lifestyle and belief.

Firstly, I was raised in a Christian home. My mother is Lutheran and my father is Catholic (lucky me huh!?). Raised in both faiths, I attended not only a Lutheran church with my mother, but also a Catholic church with my father's parents. The first part of acceptance that I needed to come to grips with was that I had no faith what-so-ever in the religion that I had been brought up in. I was pretty young when I realized this. Which in a way made things a little harder. It's not like you can go to your parents and say 'hey, I don't believe in your god and I want to find my own way.' I was about 12 or 13 when I began researching other religions.

Secondly, I had to accept that I had found a new religion/lifestyle and it was, by no means, mainstream! When a pagan faith struck a chord with me I was both fascinated and scared. I fell in love with the stories, myths, and practices of the Wiccans. I was still pretty young. I was only about 14 or 15 when I felt my life fall into place. At that age though, many people look at it as a phase, young people like to be able to rebel against their parnets and fall easily into the occult and eventually they will grow out of it as they mature. It was never about rebelling for me. It was me searching for my spiritual path. I still researched all religions and tried out many faiths. None made me feel the way that Wicca did. I even tried, when I got older after I had had my son, to become Catholic to please my family and (I can't believe I, of all people, am admitting this) tried to conform. Needless to say, I failed (thank the Goddess!)! Once I had gotten back to my true path and where I truly felt more connected to the God and Goddess than I ever had before, I completely accepted who I am. I was happier than I thought was possible!

Thirdly, the acceptance of my son and absolutely amazing boyfriend was one of the most important acceptances that I accquired. My son is raised to be tolerant and accepting of every faith. I do NOT tell him what he can and cannot believe. I encourage him to question, learn, and (when he's old enough) research any faith that he desires. If he grows up to be a Christian I will support that. If he grows up pagan, of course I will support that too! We recently moved into a new house. As I grew up I had to hide my practices and beliefs. I was not fully able to practice the rituals I wanted because I was confined to my bedroom during them. {Let me tell you... the ability to practice freely outdoors is one of the most liberating and exhilarting expirences EVER!} Here, in our new home, I am free to practice as I please. And I LOVE IT!!! The love, support, and acceptance of my immediate family means so much to me. They make my bond with the God and Goddess so much stronger. I can't gush enough about how much it means me.

Lastly, and it has not exactly happened yet but, is the acceptance of my outside family. Now that being said, it's not really acceptance in the same way that I wanted my boyfriend and my son's acceptance. It is more, I want them to know who I am. I don't want to feel like I have to hide myself from my family. I have told my mother that I am a pagan and that I am not Christian. I have not told her that I am a practicing witch. (I gotta say calling myself a witch still makes me giggle!) I want to tell her though. I just don't like to cause conflict or upset my family. But eventually it will come out. Hopefully sooner rather than later. My friends all know, and most accept it. I do not hide who I am anymore.

In conclusion (wow, this sounds way more formal than I intended it to be) the first two acceptances were most important to me. The third was an added bonus. And the fourth, although it's not required it would be nice. My life has taken many twists and turns and I am still surprised at the directions that my life has taken. I encourage EVERYONE to find what means the most to you and follow that. Accept who you are and what you are capable of. That is the most important aspect to your own happiness.

Enjoy your own journey!
     ~Blessed Be~

Merry Meet 2012!!

I would love to welcome everyone to the new year! Brightest Blessings to you all and your families!

Sorry this post took so long to get up. I have been super busy since New Year's Eve! I spent the first two days of the new year shopping with my mother and son. Not to mention, Mom kept me well fed for those few days. I was so excited that I got homemade French Onion Soup! It was absolutely delicious.

Now I know many people are busy concocting New Year's Resolutions and planning to 'change their lives' because a new year has tripped again. I, however, refuse to do such. I believe, that if you are to truly make a change in your life, that it should happen at a time when you are ready for it. Many people break and forget their resolutions by the end of the first week. If you were serious about whatever your resolution was you would have put it into motion long before the New Year. To me, New Year's Resolutions is like Lent for Catholics. People do it because they are expected too. Not because they truly mean it.

If you can stick to a Resolution, I have all that much more respect for you. I have stuck to a few resolutions in my time. But they were well thought out and easily attainable. I just don't think you should start out a new year by setting yourself up to fail. I have to say, I have been happier when not feeling guilty that I broke my resolution.

Besides, I am thoroughly happy with where I am in my life and what I have become. I am honest with myself, and that I believe is the key to happiness. It's not to be thinner, make more money, or quit smoking. It is to be honest with yourself and see your short comings for what they are. Accept who you are and what you can become. Don't let other people's idea of who you should be control who you are. It will only make you miserable.

That's enough of my ranting for one day!

~Blessed Be~